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Wednesday, July 3rd, 2002

Subject:semi annual VGA shit and not shit list
Posted by:ex_rabies128.
Time:11:01 pm.
Mood:allergic.

Shit
unwanted social advances
puking
girls who don't know how to flash properly
dirty dirty steve burns
bad room lighting
hairy yambag sucking lj people

Not Shit
björk's unborn child
codpieces
any and all catholic saints
the plantagenets
smart children
running away to the jungle


sincerely,
viciousgirlarmy
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Posted by:ex_rabies128.
Time:2:52 am.
Mood:furiously angry.
who would ever think that the glorious institution that is the Vicious Girl Army could be snubbed?
well it was, by this man.



you'd think dirty dirty steve burns would be eager to join our operation. you would think that any man would be flattered to be invited to become one of us. you would think that anyone would crap their pants to be nominated for the position of general.

well.
needless to say, dirty dirty steve burns, you are no longer the subject of our masturbatory fantasies. your association with the OFWT and other inane individuals cannot, and will not be tolerated. your invitation to become the one and only male member of the Vicious Girl Army has been revoked. If this was physical reality, and not just some intangible web of ones and zeros, we would be kicking you in the shins and yelling at you. take that, you nasty little man.
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Monday, May 13th, 2002

Posted by:ex_rabies128.
Time:6:15 pm.
Mood:clever.
The VGA guide to education of the general population




there will be strict physical and mental training similar to what the Bene Gesserit recieve (please read Frank Herbert's Dune for further reference). special emphasis will be put into basic human control and how to reduce someone to simpering tears by a cleverly constructed sentence taking advantage of the person's emotional weak spots. students will graduate by age 11, to insure that the work of the Vicious Girl Army can be carried out in a more timely fashion. we may choose to mentally strengthen students through artificial means to make their work more thorough and complete.

there will be schools established in each country for hand-picked students, who will recieve an even more thorough education than what is offered in public schools. due to strict security measures, we can not go into any details regarding the curriculum in said schools.

item one
grades 1-3 shall take mandatory classes on the fine art of slapping. at the end of each term every student must do a presentation of the finer points of slapping people's pathetic asses across the room. the student will be graded on form, strategy and stance.

item two
every six months students will be excused from their classes and taken to a large auditorium where films will be shown on the following subjects.
- a history of incest
- a history of cannibalism
- a history of zombies
- DSCIBP
- how to spot a potentional GGMG and how to successfully attack



item three
all female students will wear a uniform similar to what is described here. school colors will be used on the sash.

item four
Physical Education will focus on the finer art of fighting with sharpened knitting needles. also reflex strengthening exercises will be practiced daily. there will be physical education electives for students who choose to make physical fighting a more emphasized subject in their training.


item five
grades 1 will take an intensive course on VGA secret battle language, using discreet hand signals.

grades 2 will take a class on deciphering and creating secret spy codes.

grades 3-5 will take classes in esperanto.





please note this is an early draft of the complex system that is to come. please keep in touch for further updates.


yours,
viciousgirlarmy
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Monday, April 1st, 2002

Subject:fear us
Posted by:ex_rabies128.
Time:2:13 pm.
Mood:revolutionary.
please expect a forthcoming manifesto in the next few days/weeks/months/when the fuck ever


the shit list:
- anti-bep
- bad trannies
- GGMG
- turtle heads covered in bird shit (wait we meant DSCIBP)



the not shit list:
- sharpened knitting needles
- burt reynolds (so handsome!)
- remington steele (so gay!)
- foot & genital contact (so raunchy!)
- ourselves



also
the truth list:
- certain lj people suck hairy yambags (this is so!)

- the björk list
- she has a bun in the oven (quite possible!)
- she is a cokehad (so true)
- she drank away her youthful looks (who would argue?)
- really a terrible sense of fashion at times (how can you justify a fluffy swan?)
- she doesn't write her own songs (obviously so)

- certain lj people still suck hairy yambags

sincerely yours, jinxmalone & rabies
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LiveJournal for scientifically designed.

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